NFL Week 17 Picks – It’s Godzilla Time! Tired of All this Winning Yet?

Two weeks to go. Over half of all NFL teams are still in the playoff picture. Folks, it doesn’t get any better than this in Week 17.  Let’s make some jack.

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Buckle up! BTW, I am exactly .500 this season ATS, after pushing on the Titans +14 on Thursday night. That’s a lot of games to pick for a .500 record after 16 weeks. Time to get the vig back.

Colts at Giants -5.5 

The Giants are at home and in the playoff hunt. The Colts have now transgressed into the league’s worst nightmare. The Jeff Saturday experiment blew up in Colts owner Robert Irsay’s face. He hired a high school coach to lead his team. It shows.

They have no quarterback and no short-term future. Saturday is history after week 18. This team has basically quit as evidenced by the laydown against the Chargers. While it’s tough to lay 5.5 points on this pathetic Giants offense, they are in a good position to run the ball against a suspect Colts front four. The Giants will win this game, it’s a matter of the margin.

Pick: Giants -5.5 

Saints at Eagles -5.5

No Jalen Hurts. It’s Minchew mania! The Saints need to win out — and have about 90 other teams lose to make it to week 19. The bottom line is simple: The Eagles have not locked up either the division or a first-round bye. They’ll be facing a hungry Giants team next week. The Saints, despite their win last week at Cleveland, have a multitude of issues. Will the Eagles lose two in a row? At home? The Eagles wrap things up at home and rest the team next week. The ‘Aint’s are back.

Pick: Eagles – 5.5 

Broncos at Chiefs -12.5 

Denver’s spit-up last week on national television on Christmas Day night was one of the sorriest quit jobs I have ever seen in the NFL. They literally stopped tackling and checked out, costing their hapless head coach his job in unceremonious fashion the next day. He got fired at 9:00 AM EST. Sad. KC is fighting for a number one seed at home and with Buffalo traveling to Ohio on Monday night, this game is real for the Arrowhead faithful. Plus, Denver doesn’t score. So it may as well be 25.5.

Pick: Kansas City -12.5 

Bears at Lions -5.5 

The Vegas Wise Guys and the pay-to-play call this 800-number weasels are all picking the Bears today based on one thing: Detroit cannot stop the run. The Cats ran through them last week like a Panzer division going over the phony French Maginot Line. And the Bears run the ball. Here’s the rub: Chicago can’t stop a nosebleed. The Lions are backed up against the wall, and Goff will throw the ball around like he’s playing a sandlot catch. Bet against the money creeps in Vegas. You always win.

Pick: Lions -5.5 

Jags at Texans + 4 

This game means nothing to Jacksonville. Win or lose –they have to beat Tennessee next week to get in the playoffs. So like the Titans on Thursday night, why risk anything? Meanwhile, Houston is playing for Lovie Smith and if they win out they actually would have a winning record in the division. I like the Texans here playing a Jags team who is disinterested at best. It’s all about next Sunday.

Pick: Texans +4 

Cats at Bucs -3.5 

Well, here we are. Who would have ever thought this game would likely be for the NFC South crown? Here is some advice given to us by our senior contributor Nate Perry on our Godzilla Wins radio show this week: If you want to bet the Cats, and think they can win today, go the futures on Draft Kings and you get +450 CATS to win the division. That beats the +165 money line on today’s game. Better odds.

After firing their beleaguered head coach Matt Rhule (who we predicted would be gone by Halloween BTW) and then conducting a fire sale with some key players, Charlotte is now in prime position to win the division and get a home playoff game.

But first, they have to beat Tampa on the road and endure Tom Brady in a must-win game. The Buccaneers can clinch the NFC South with a win, and as bad as they’ve looked recently, I think they’re going to pull it off as Tom Brady is well, Tom Brady. Another game, another find-a-way win from Tom Brady. Who’s going to bet against this guy in a game like this? And bet on Sam Darnold?

Pick: Bucs -3.5 

Fish at Pats -2.5 

I love the Pats at home after two losses in a row – both games they could have won. Miami doesn’t believe in concussion protocols, I guess. Tua’s three picks on the last three Dolphins drives last week looked like he lost his whereabouts. While Tua is out today, I don’t see the Fish going into Gillette and beating a very pissed-off and very hungry Pats team. New England has put itself in a win-out or go-home scenario. They win and keep their playoff hopes alive and well. The Fins are finished.

Pick: Pats -2.5

Brownies at Commies -2.5 

Damn, I love the Commies in this spot. Cleveland is a tale of two cities: win one week, lose the next two. They are 2-5 on the road. This is a big game for Washington to keep their playoff hopes alive – I believe they are a better offense with Carson Wentz under center. No one can now doubt the Commies’ defensive front – it’s ferocious. Washington is a better club than their record shows. Deshaun Watson has been downright horrific in his four starts. Washington controls their own destiny.

Pick: Commies -2.5 

Cards at Atlanta Clown Show (ACS) -6.5 

Please make it all go away. Who cares?

Pick: No Pick 

‘Niners at Vegas +9.5 

This is easy. Vegas is done, and they jettisoned their quarterback Derek Carr to the ashbin of Raiders history. The NFL is a tough business. Vegas owner Mark Davis decided to move on from Carr and sidelined him because if he got hurt his contract called for full pay which is over $20 million for next year. If he gets cut, he only owes a little over $5 million. Now the Raiders’ front office says he’s on the trading block.

This all leads to an S.F. blowout.

Pick: ‘Niners -9.5 

J-E-T-S at Hawks -2 

It’s a New York JETS kind of Day. No more Zach Wilson. No more games. Mark White is back. Geno Smith has tanked. Last Thursday night’s debacle against Jacksonville is in the rearview mirror. Jets: Playoffs??

Pick: Jets -2 

Vikes at Pack -3.5 

Aaron Rodgers is on fire, the Pack is back and they have to win out. Minnesota is coasting to a home playoff game. Green Bay will be the most dangerous wild-card team come two weeks. What do the Vikings have to play for today? Not much. And the Packers? Survival.

Pick: Pack -3.5 

Rams at Bolts -6.5 

The Chargers are healthy and they look like a playoff team now. The Rams ran up the score on a team of quitters last week. Two losses and the Bolts play golf. Not today.

Pick: Bolts -6.5 

Steelers at Ravens -2 

As much as we love betting on Pittsburgh as an underdog on this site, this is now a must-win game for Baltimore to stay relevant. At home against a bitter division rival, the Ravens have to show the world they belong. The Birds are still in contention in the AFC North race, and they’ll remain in contention with a big win over the Steelers at home. Pittsburgh’s playoff chances are 100-1.

Pick: Ravens -2 

Monday Night Football: Bills at Bungles +1 

Will let you know Monday at noon!